Spiritual disciplines: how to stop racing through them and relax into God
Practicing spiritual disciplines like prayer, solitude, and unplugging can easily feel like needing to reach a super-high level of holiness or faith, to get it right, or to find that one perfect practice so I can have a breakthrough experience with God. When I started practicing spiritual disciplines, I did it like an Olympian. I blocked regular time on my calendar for the entire month, did it religiously, and even journaled about it. I was exercising my spiritual muscles and striving for that prize! But after that month was over, I moved on. Time for a fresh practice, a new mountain to summit. Whatever discipline seemed like the next achievable goal drove me to do more so I could feel like I was more before God.
Basically, I stayed in the shallows. I noticed a little progress in my spiritual life, but overall, I wasn’t going anywhere. Another thing I noticed was that there were one or two practices I really connected with, and the rest, well, you could say I miserably failed at.
This can be incredibly frustrating for achiever types. We want to power through, check the boxes, and do the God-centered life really really well. Maybe we want God to notice or affirm us. Maybe we want the security of controlling the spiritual life to what degree we can when everything else seems out of control. Maybe you’re used to succeeding at most stuff you try without much difficulty.
The spiritual disciplines don’t work that way. So what do we do when we fall flat on our face? How do we approach God when we appear to be getting nowhere fast?
A phrase repeated at the Renovare Institute is:
Do as you can, not as you can’t.
In other words, don’t try to do all the things! Do what you have the capacity to do, and have the courage to trust God with the gaps. This means I still pray and make plans with God, but I ask him daily: where is one place you would like me to join you today God?
The spiritually rich life grows at an incredibly slow pace. It’s not a race or a place to prove myself. If I’m doing that, then I need to go back to the basics: God’s love and grace for a sinner like me.
What I needed (and still need) is to focus my practice through the eye of a needle.
What is the one practice that feels really life-giving but also gives me some resistance?
Do that one thing.
In a world of copious options and the push to show off our spiritual life to get affirmation or a sense of control, this feels very hidden and potentially insecurity-inducing. When I spread myself thin among a myriad of practices to feel that adrenaline rush of quick success, I lose the ability to go deep, to cultivate a richly tilled life.
We are humans, not robots.
We are people, not processes.
We don’t want shallow roots.
We want deep ones!
To go deep requires me to focus on one thing. Here I can give God my whole attention. It’s like reading one chapter of a book over an hour or two and really living the story instead of scrolling through 30 social media posts in a half hour and remembering nothing.
When I give God my attention, then together we can really address places where he wants to grow me. I gain strength and awareness which will sustain me for really tough seasons. I learn to listen to my life better, to make changes that really last, and the stuff that doesn’t need to be there seems to fall away.
When I began doing the spiritual disciplines, I did it with an achiever mentality. God has deliberately been deconstructing this part of my identity, one brick at a time.
One of the disciplines I’ve been practicing for many years is the examen prayer. And it’s the one that God brings me back to again and again. It invites awareness to my emotions like no other prayer because it asks open-ended questions. I can’t hide from God or ignore what I’m feeling. I have to be completely honest, and that takes some real heart work. This is good for me. Because only when I recognize God’s presence with me in tough emotions and circumstances, am I free to move forward in areas of my life where I feel real resistance.
Even though I go through seasons where the examen doesn’t feel like the prayer for me because it's rather vulnerable and it takes a lot of time, I never regret the moments I set aside my agenda for God’s. Faithfully, he meets me there. I feel free, loved, and more secure in my identity in Him. I become content in my hiddenness, and this is truly humbly and uplifting at the same time.
Yes, it is possible to do the spiritual disciplines with the wrong intention: when we approach them as a me-focused mechanism to feel better about ourselves or a means to any end that is not God-focused. The point of the spiritual life is to go deeper with God as we are able: that often means moving incredibly slowly with the God who loves us and wants us to focus solely on Him. Sometimes it means falling down. Even, here the Spirit forms us into the fullness of our humanity.
That’s what I try to do in my work here: to give you a place to slow down and listen to God, especially through your own art.
One of my subscribers recently shared with me about the encouragement she gets here on the blog and through my newsletter:
“It has helped me breathe. To take a moment and just let it all go. It helps ground me and remember why I do what I do.”
-Brittany Good, graphic designer
If you’d like to learn more about how spiritual practices can root you in your belovedness and embolden you to be a more attentive, compassionate, and courageous leader, please sign up for my e-newsletter below.
